Emily is a marketing manager who wrote to me a few months ago. She was in the middle of a job search and updating her LinkedIn. What she told me has stuck in my head ever since:
“Every photo I upload feels wrong. Too young, too serious, too casual, too much makeup, not enough makeup. Meanwhile, my coworker Dan has a grainy kitchen photo with bad lighting and nobody cares. He still gets recruiter messages.”
At first, I thought she was exaggerating. But the more I paid attention, the more I realized she wasn’t.
Men can get away with a default headshot. Collared shirt, neutral smile, click upload, done. Nobody questions it.
Women don’t get that luxury. Every single choice is scrutinized. Smile too wide? “Not serious.” Smile too little? “Cold.” Hair styled? “Tries too hard.” Hair natural? “Not polished.” It’s a damned-if-you-do, damned-if-you-don’t situation.
And honestly, it’s exhausting.
The Double Standard I Keep Hearing About
I run a service that generates AI headshots. Every day I talk to people about their photos. I get emails, DMs on Reddit, random late-night feedback.
What’s wild is how often women say the exact same thing Emily did. They feel like their professional credibility is being graded on a much harsher curve than men.
And it’s not just about appearance—it’s about opportunity. Recruiters, hiring managers, clients… they’re all human, and humans make snap judgments in under a second. If your photo doesn’t hit the narrow “acceptable” range, you start at a disadvantage.
I wish I could say Emily’s story was rare. It’s not. In fact, research from Chicago Booth confirms what I hear every day: men and women are judged on the same visual cues, but women are judged more harshly for violating them.
Her Breaking Point
She actually tried doing the “right” thing before finding me. Paid a photographer $350. Booked a 2-hour shoot. Picked outfits. Did hair and makeup. The whole production.
And she hated the results. Not because the photographer was bad, but because every shot felt like it leaned too far one way or the other. Too polished. Too stiff. Too smiley. Too flat.
She told me: “I’m paying money just to overthink myself into a corner.”
That’s when she gave ProfileMagic a shot. Not because she was sold on AI. Honestly, she was skeptical. But $29.99 felt like a safer gamble than blowing another few hundred on a reshoot.
She uploaded some regular selfies. Nothing fancy. An hour later, she had 50 versions. Not all were winners (they never are). But a handful hit the sweet spot. She swapped out her LinkedIn photo, and for the first time, she felt like her picture wasn’t working against her.
That shift mattered. Her photo stopped being a liability she worried about, and started being something she could move past.
What This Taught Me
Running this business has forced me to listen a lot more than I expected. At the start, I thought people just wanted cheap, fast headshots. Convenience. But the more conversations I’ve had, the more I see it’s about fairness.
Women, people of color, anyone outside the “default LinkedIn dude” mold—they feel judged harder. They’re tired of trying to thread the impossible needle.
That’s why AI headshots have taken off with these groups. Not because they’re chasing perfection, but because they finally get photos that feel like them, without the constant second-guessing.
What surprised me most is that people don’t want flawless. They want credible. They want to look like themselves on a good day. That’s what I wrote about in From Invisible to Visible: The Magic of a Headshot that Speaks for You. The right image doesn’t land you the role—but it gets you noticed enough to have a shot.
Why Traditional Photography Feels Out of Step
This might sound contrarian, but I think traditional headshot photography hasn’t adapted to the reality women face.
It’s expensive. It’s slow. And it still leaves you with maybe 3–5 options, if you’re lucky. If those don’t work, you’re back to square one.
Meanwhile, guys can shrug and say, “Eh, this’ll do.” Women rarely get to say that.
That’s why people like Emily are turning to AI. For her, it wasn’t about saving money—it was about finally having options that didn’t make her feel judged before she even got into an interview.
So, Are Women Judged 10x Harder?
From where I sit, yes. I’ve just heard it too many times to dismiss. The rules are different, and the bar is higher.
The upside? Tech is at least giving people a way around it. Services like mine aren’t perfect, but they’re starting to level the playing field. Instead of one “final” photo you have to pray works, you get dozens to choose from. You can test, switch, update, experiment. You take back control.
Final Thought
If you’re a woman reading this and nodding along, I want you to know—you’re not imagining it. The double standard is real. And you shouldn’t have to twist yourself into knots to meet it.
Whether you use AI, a photographer, or even just a friend’s iPhone, my advice is this: stop aiming for “perfect.” Aim for professional and authentic. Because once people actually talk to you, the photo fades. But until then, it’s the gatekeeper.
And unfortunately, women still have to pass through a much narrower gate.